I went for a walk last weekend on one of my favorite trails. I had been really busy all week with work and was feeling suffocated from being inside all week. For me, when I feel like that (incidentally this works for EVERYONE-there have been studies) I hit the trail.

Well…it wasn’t the experience I was looking for. It was loud with kids running around and scaring off any chance of peace and bird/wildlife sightings. In hindsight, not the best choice of trails based on what I was looking for that day, as I know this one gets busy with families.

Different more peaceful walk day

So as I was walking and the last family let their kids go screaming past me…I decided it was time for me to go home. I honestly was so frustrated and felt so angry because I didn’t get what I was looking for, so my mindset was actually worst than when I started.

As I was walking home, I thought about my anger. It was not justified. It’s a GOOD thing that families are out enjoying nature. Thank god they take their kids outside and let them run!!

And..it led me to thinking. Why am I so angry?

I was mad at myself. For getting annoyed. Because, I talk to people about positive mindset all the time. And if I do that, if someone saw how angry I was, would that impact their view of me? Would it discredit the mindset work and things I write to help people?

And these thoughts led me here.

Why are people resistant to mindset work?

They’re scared. Like me. They’re afraid of being judged when they have these moments. They think that if you embark on this journey to a positive mindset and kindness to others and meditating and affirming and doing all these things that you have to be like that all the time!!

And that is not humanly possible.

I’ve had people judge me for having a bad reaction to something. For getting angry in a moment where I could have had more patience.

That’s not the fault of the other person, it’s the fault of society. This perception of perfection. And it’s incredibly harmful.

When we do mindset work, it’s to LESSEN these instances of reactivity. It’s to teach you how to pause more often before you freak out. It is not to make you perfect all the time. You are HUMAN not a robot with no feelings.

This journey of mindset wellness has taught me so much about myself and I am so glad to be where I am today which is a huge improvement over where I have been.

I’m including today a recording I did that day talking about how I was feeling and all of this…please forgive the quality- I used my camera in the moment so it’s interesting 😂

Supplement to all of this written content today! Me in the moment. Not perfect but isn’t that the point?

Today I want to hear from you. Have you been afraid to embark on this work because you think you’ll need to be perfect once you start? Let me know!!

As always, I am here to assist you on your journey.



3 responses to “What is holding you back?”

  1. Erin Avatar

    Patti!!!! This is the best And so true! I do the same thing and am working on it. All of our chats/discussions etc I’ve realized I’m holding myself back in life.
    First thing I’ve realized is I have a “description” of myself that I believe others think because I’m quirky, awkward a bit off the wall and adventurous but I always think people just think I’m weird. I’m trying to turn this around because maybe I have things to offer, adventures to share or just making people laugh.
    Second massive thing over the past year is my horseback riding. A few decades ago I was competing and ranking quite high up in some of the shows, I was strong and fearless. Well life threw me many curve balls and I’m not the same. I struggle with confidence and getting back in shape to the extent I need to be for my riding. With all of our chats you’ve made me think “why oh why am I always so hard on myself”. I don’t have to live up to how I used to be and no one expects that either. The past 2-3 weeks I have really let that go and guess what…I’m doing better with my jumping and confidence.
    We get so trapped in these mid sets and it’s really hard to put the work in and STOP. Thank you for these posts and your positivity. You’re a cheerleader without even knowing ❤️


    1. pattifarnan Avatar

      Omg this is huge for you…knowing you the way I do- I am so freaking proud of you! So so proud! You’re doing all the things and the changes are STAGGERING! I love you with all my heart and I am so beyond blessed to call you my friend. Thank you for sharing because I know this wouldn’t have been easy to be so open 🥰 argh my heart is so full! I’m really thankful that our chats have helped you. So thankful. It’s done as much for me as it apparently has for you


      1. Erin Avatar



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